patience. yeah, I said it. AND I prayed for it.

So. I have always been told to never pray for patience. 

"Well you know, Dana, if you pray for patience,  God will SURELY teach you a lesson in waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting......"  You get the idea.

Hm.

Waiting for what I wonder? 

I'm alive now aren't I? I have Christ on my side so whom shall I fear? Right? I think I have heard that somewhere. ;) 

Well, there really is nothing to fear. Death has lost it's sting, freedom in Christ is mine, and Gosh darnit, I AM ALIVE. 

That is SO enough for me. I could not have said that a few months ago. And some days, its not. I try (note TRY) to choose joy and contentment. 

CHOOSE joy. It is not bestowed upon me. Each day is new and a new opportunity to choose to be happy with who I am, where I am, and the countless blessings in my life. 

That is not to say I don't get nervous about the future. That doesn't mean that I want to be a nun and live in a convent (not that there is anything wrong with being a nun). I simply mean that I am at peace. I am not waiting on any person, any special job, wealth, or even perfect health. 

If I am constantly in a waiting pattern and looking towards the next step, the next phase....then how can I truly take in the beauty of contentment of the NOW. The present. It is not perfect but it is.....mine. 

I refuse to put all of my stock in material things, humans (male and female) who inevitably disappoint (because they are HUMAN), dream jobs, and dreams of family and a white picket fence. 

I put my stock in Christ. I am complete in Him and really...all things after that are beautiful added bonuses and gifts from Him. 

I really have never felt so focused and......at peace and content.

So, BOOM, BAM my peeps. I prayed for patience and now I feel content. Chicka Chicka Yeeeeeayaaaah. 

And I am totally cool with patience. We are down. We are BUDS. Best buds. That is, until somebody gets in front of my car driving 20 miles under the speed limit. Not my brightest moments. But I mean, SERIOUSLY. Drive at least the minimum speed limit. 

What was I saying? Oh, yes. Patience and peace. Got it. I am Cooooool as a cucumber. HA. 

Thats it, folks. 

And of course some pictures to share from the last little bit. Will get to more later. 

I will post an update about my health and some of the progressions I have made and still some things were working on with the team of doctors to manage. 

Later, my abundant living peeps,

Dana

an ode to technology.

An ode to technology... 

Technology has saved my heart during these past few months. 

One of the hardest parts about being in the hospital or being homebound during recovery, is the feeling of loneliness. The feeling that you are stuck on pause and the rest of the world is going on without you. The feeling that all the people you love and care about have somehow forgotten about you. Whether that is a rational thought or not, it still hurts. It makes the healing process even more difficult than it already is. 

These past couple of hospital stays I have started really using Skype or Facetime to talk to family and friends. I just can't even really put into words how much this has helped me this go around.

You see, when you are talking to someone and seeing their face, facial expressions, and surroundings...it makes you feel like you have spent time with them. It warms my heart and helps to patch up the holes in my heart that inevitably appear when I spend countless days in hospitals. 

I have had lighthearted conversations, silly conversations, serious life talks, and emotional conversations where we virtually cry together and hug. 

Like this one time, Casey facetimed me so we could watch funny youtube videos together...

And other laughs and giggles...

And other countless times I got to hear my precious nieces' voices...

Or see my other precious friends and their precious children that mean the world to me...

So thank you technology. For such a cold word - you have allowed my dearest loved ones to warm my heart and keep me sane. 

Thats all for now. More of an update to come soon! 

living abundantly,

dana

a little update for all my peeps.

Hello, hello bloggy readers!

 I am so excited to get back to blogging. So excited, in fact, I don't even know where to start with my long overdue life/chronic illness update. 

Let's start with a little health update. I know that most of my family and friends that live out of town read this blog to see how I am doing, what to pray for, etc. That is the primary purpose of this blog; making people I love feel a little closer when we can't be together. 

Welp. I wish I had some better news about my health to share. The past few months have been rough. And thats putting it pretty mildly. I have had a couple of surgeries and a few hospital stays. Sigh. 

All of these surgeries and issues I have been having are further complications from my original pancreatectomy and islet cell transplant surgery I had in April 2011. We knew going into this surgery that there were many "possible" complications but its definitely different living out the fine print. It is a daily struggle for me not to give way to my natural tendency to be very bitter and angry. And some days, I lose that battle.

 I want to be this positive role model and handle this "situation" with grace but sometimes thats just hard to do. Because this "situation" I am in, these cards I have been dealt, SUCK stink. Its not fair that I am in my twenties and I have a portacath, feeding tubes (JG tubes), and now an insulin pump. Its not fair that I was just in the hospital for 5 weeks and now I am homebound while recovering from yet ANOTHER setback. Its not fair that I work so hard in school and I yet again have to play catch up and always feel behind because of my necessary absences. Its not fair that I can't be alone because of the "brittle" nature of my diabetes. Its. NOT. fair. 

Some days I straight up feel like throwing a tantrum. A full-blown toddler tantrum. 

And some days, I do. In the privacy of my own home, but still. Its a tantrum. God is always so patient and kind with me during these tantrum moments. He never tires of my daily struggles and never gets overwhelmed with my sin. 

So thats where I am at with that. I am currently at home recovering from a 5 week stay in 2 different hospitals. It has been so hard. I am not even going to try and sugar coat it or make it seem like "yay, I am so grateful for being sick!" No. I am not grateful for being sick. I am grateful for the perspective God gives me during these times and the growth that I inevitably experience during these hard times....but it doesn't make it easy. 

So thats a general summary of my health status as of late. I will go into more detail as I go forward with the blog. On another note...are you ready for this? I have some exciting news....

I AM GRADUATING FROM GRADUATE SCHOOL IN 1 MONTH!!!

It's happening! It's here! I did it! I did it! (almost) 

That has been my light at the end of the tunnel. I am excited to be moving into  a different chapter. A chapter that does not include any academics. I am over this whole education thing. ;) Education is sooo 2012.

Oh and last but certainly no where near the least, my second niece was born in August of 2012. She is so precious and sweet. For the purposes of the blog, her name is little Em. Little Em has the sweetest demeanor and really is such a good baby. I adore her. Some say laughter is the best medicine but I say babies and laughter are a tie for the best medicine.   

And of course pictures....

(above) the day little em was born

 Oh and we can't forget little Em's big sister...Miss H! 

She is as loving and free-spirited as always and she is so fun to be around. 2.5 is such a fun age. She brightens my world and always knows how to make me smile. 

Okay well, thats all for now folks. More pictures, updates, and much more to come! Yay blog! Yay bloggy friends! Yay. 

living abundantly,

Dana :) 

a fresh start.

So.....I have decided to blog once again! Get excited. 

As you can see, I have created a new blog site. I kept the blog name (the abundant life) but wanted to start this new adventure with a fresh sheet of paper, if you will. My last blog site was about a certain time in my life and about my journey through my transplant surgery and the recovery after. And this one will be about....well....me and my super cool and exciting life without a pancreas. Ha. 

I am a writer at heart and writing has always been my creative outlet. So these past months of not blogging has been tough. I have had an interesting year. I have gone through some major changes and some very hard life things. I wanted to write about it but I wasn't sure I was ready or willing to discuss it on my very public blog. So...I didn't. 

And I'm glad I didn't. 

But I'm ready to start fresh. New blog, new beginnings. I'm beginning a new chapter in my life, taking a turn into the unknown future and I am so TERRIFIED excited! So I formally invited my bloggity blog skills back into my world and it RSVP'ed: heck yes, the blog is ON. 

STILL living abundantly,

 Dana :)